Bamboozled

Wes and I use this term to refer to any instance when one of our babies suddenly becomes mesmerized by something that subsequently calms them down from being crabby patties. While we haven't found anything that works 100% of the time, we have found a few items that work rather well at pulling them out of a fussy spell. It's hilarious when it happens. One of them will be crying hysterically, we will introduce one of the items below, and then BOOM! they're calm and officially bamboozled. Sometimes these things will just distract them so that they forget what they were upset about and other times they will actually become calmed by these little gems. Here's the list of our bamboozling tools.

The Hair Dryer

Our most effective weapon is the hair dryer. This works 9 times out of 10 at calming down our babies. We have been known to sit in the bathroom with a fussy newborn for upwards of 30 minutes until he or she falls asleep (Aunt Erin knows all about this). In fact, the hair dryer is running right now in my office (safely propped up of course) while I'm writing this post.

Patrick the Peacock

This one only works with Viv. She has a toy Peacock named Patrick who she loves unconditionally. She will stare at him for what seems like forever. She loves looking at all of his bright colors and his big blue eyes. Sometimes when Vivi is mildly upset (this will not work if she's irate), we can place Patrick in her line of vision and she will just stare and stare and stare at him. Gavin, on the other hand, could care less about Patrick. He might actually hate him. We think he's just jealous of all the attention Patrick gets from Vivi.

A Bouncer

These contraptions are so damn useful! In our house, they have been known to keep a calm baby calm, soothe a fussy baby, and make any baby fall asleep. They are glorious.

Elvis Presley

I know this sounds strange, but our twins like to listen to Elvis Presley. How do we know this? Well, when I was little, my dad always sang "Love Me Tender" to me when I would fall asleep. And therefore, I love that song. When the twins were born, I found myself singing it to them as they fell asleep. I decided to buy the song on iTunes to play for them. They (Gavin more than Vivian) were silent the first time they heard Elvis sing it. And, they continue to be bamboozled by the song now and then. I'd like to say that they love it because somehow they know how important the song is to me, but in reality, I think it's his deep voice that gets 'em.

A Running Shower

Although expensive, running the shower really calms then down. The combination of the sound and the warmth really pacifies G & V. I tried to elicit the same response with an hour long "Mountain Rain" MP3 I bought on iTunes with no luck. The MP3 can keep them calm if they're already relaxed, but it is incapable of bringing them back from Crabbytown. The shower works like a charm, most of the time.

The Car

This one is for Gavin. The second you place him in the car, he is instantly bamboozled and immediately falls asleep. There's nothing he can do about it. He can't fight it. If in the car, he'll sleep through a dirty diaper, a feeding, a screaming sister, etc. He's incapable of waking up- until we stop.

Going Outside

This works sometimes. When it's sunny. And, when you're not out there for too long.

The Vacuum

Like the hair dryer, the loud noise of the vacuum relaxes the grouchiest of babies. Well, Vivian can be pretty f-ing grouchy at times. In the throws of her complete insanity, she needs a combination of the vacuum and 2-4 other devices.

The Trusty Pacifier

Gavin enjoys the pacifier more than Vivian. In fact, if you try to soothe V with a paci and she doesn't want it, she will become even more furious than she was pre-paci-insertion. Vivi's pretty tough. She knows what she wants and she knows what she doesn't want. You shouldn't f&#% with her.

Sometimes these gizmos work and other times they don't. But, a combination of 2 or 3 of these tricks of the trade will almost always result in bamboozlement. What were your infants bamboozled by?