She's Got Sleep Problems

When I was pregnant with Viv and Gavin, I remember having a conversation with my friend Elizabeth about sleeping (or lack of sleeping). Elizabeth had one daughter at the time (she has two now) and was telling me about her friend's 12-month old who was still not sleeping through the night and who was having major problems going to bed on her own. Elizabeth's daughter started sleeping through the night with minimal sleep problems around 6 or 7 months. When we were talking about this friend of hers, I (a childless person) was quick to judge. "They must be going crazy! 12 months of interrupted sleep! They're just not trying. They don't know what to do. I would never have a child like that."

I was right. I wouldn't have a child like that. No no, my child would be much, much worse, with 22 (and counting) months of sleep problems! Sometimes I can't believe that this is my life. And the large majority of the problems are with Little Miss Vivian. If it's not one thing with her, it's something else. Vivian has a wide variety of sleep problems that she picks and chooses from weekly. On average, she will have 1 or 2 of these issues for 2-3 weeks and then right when you think you have her figured out, she'll switch it up. Here are her common bedtime dilemnas:

Problem #1: She doesn't want to go to bed.

Vivian is usually really good about falling asleep. Historically, she is much better at this than her brother. But sometimes, Vivian will go on a no-sleep-for-her-or-anyone-around-her rampage. She will scream uncontrollably the second you put her down and will continue to scream at full volume. Forever. Until of course, you come back in and either rock her to sleep or get in the crib with her until she falls asleep. Yep, you read correctly. I will get in her crib with her until she falls asleep. And sometimes, I fall asleep too and wake up 2-3 hours later to find myself in the fetal position with a baby two inches away from me breathing in my face. While this problem can be annoying, it doesn't happen very often (especially when compared to the other problems) and there is a quick fix- getting into bed with her instantly stops the crying. Last week, she didn't even cry when I was saying goodnight. Instead, she just sweetly tapped her pillow next to her head and said, "pwease? pwease?" (Translation: please mommy, sleep next to me on my pillow until I fall asleep). It was too precious.

Problem #2: She wants to wake wakes up early.

Vivian is notorious for waking up early. And once she's decided that she's awake, nothing can get her to go back to sleep. Several of our friends have blogged or Facebook statused that their children wake up early, but I'm not sure if anyone has a child like Vivian. For instance, my friend once wrote on her blog that she wished her daughter would sleep past 6:30am. Yet another friend Facebooked that she was sick of her child waking up at 6:00am every morning that week. Vivian's early morning doesn't start at 6:30 or 6:00 or even 5:00. Nope. When Viv is on a wake-up-early stint, the screaming will begin between 4:00 and 4:30 AM! It's actually quite ridiculous. In fact, Miss V has woken up between 4:00 and 4:30 am every single morning for the last 8 days (including this morning). And it's not like she's not tired. She wakes up cranky and pissed off about something that you are unable to figure out, which just makes her more upset. I've been at my wit's end with her lately and I have to admit that I've given her a marshmallow for the last 3 mornings to keep her quiet. I've tried everything. For a couple of days, I let her cry for 15 minutes to see if she would just go back to sleep. Not only did that not work, but I then had TWO cranky toddlers awake at 4:30am. I also tried running in there right when I hear the first little cry to try and rock her back to sleep in my arms. That didn't work either. She just got excited that I came in and started asking to go in the living room. If I say no, screaming ensues. So, I usually say yes. We go snuggle on the couch together and watch Sesame Street for the next 1.5-2 hours, or until Gavin wakes up. I also tried just going in when she wakes up and giving her a sippy cup of milk and a cracker to see if she would eat it and go back to sleep. Nope. So I'm usually stuck in the living room with her watching Elmo, eating a marshmallow, and drinking some milk at 4am.

Problem #3: She wakes up in the middle of the night and cannot go back to sleep.

When Vivian took medication for her hemangioma last year, the main side effect was nightmares. Isn't that terrible? Ever since then, she has nightmares a lot. It's really rather pitiful. She'll wake up screaming like she broke her arm in the crib, I'll run in, and she'll be shaking, crying, and reaching out for me. Then there are other times when she wakes up with a stomach ache, tooth pain, no pacifiers in her crib, or for no apparent reason at all. During these late-night wakings, one of a few things will happen. On a good night, I'll either lay down with her on the twin mattress in their room and she'll go back to sleep or I'll bring her back to our bed and she'll go back to sleep. On a bad night, she won't settle down until she gets milk, a graham cracker, a little Sesame Street, and some cuddling. Either way, waking up in the middle of the night with an almost two-year-old is no fun.


I'm sure there are more to discuss, but I'm too tired to think about them right now.

Viv's current sleep problem is waking up too early, but week before last it was not wanting to go to sleep. I wonder what she'll pick next.

In the end, Vivi's sleep patterns are erratic, unpredictable, and exhausting. I just hope that she can take on her brother's "I can sleep anywhere and for a long time" attitude soon.